Homework #8

Homework question

This week's homework is to read an article from the Japan Times and give your opinion. http://search.japantimes.co.jp/member/member.html?ek20060110ks.htm Do you agree or disagree with the author (who is Japanese). Please explain why in your blog.

Homework answer

Honestly, I'm having a lot of trouble answering this question. I haven't dated very much in my life, and I've been with my current boyfriend for the last five years - so I really have no idea what the "dating scene" is like, even in America. Plus, I don't have a very clear picture of eligible Japanese men, since I don't know any my own age. But I'll try to think of something, based on what little I know...

I've definitely heard the complaints and discussions about "today's Japanese men are too feminine" before, from gender-studies books I've read on Japanese society - and, of course, from friends too. Actually, one friend of mine just recently told me about a word commonly used to describe modern Japanese men: 草食, "herbivorous." As in, they have no killer instinct and no primal urges: they just stay safe and placid in their own little world, and don't go out hunting, as boring as animals that only eat grass. Again, I don't know how true it is for everybody, but I can kind of imagine this being a good description. The image is definitely out there, at least, and it's a problem women think about in everyday life.

I think the "dislike of love relationships" discussed in the article could easily be an issue for many Americans, too. I know it's not for everyone (a whole bunch of my friends got married this year) but it is for some. Living for jobs, hobbies, and the privacy to do what they want, when they want: that's something guys just seem to do in recent years. Some of the reasons are probably different in the US, but the result is kind of the same. Men date casually, perhaps, but they don't want to get tied down to one person. Many men in America are afraid of responsibility - they just want to play, instead of thinking seriously about the future. Or they're too wrapped up in themselves to be able to bother with somebody else.

Also, a lot of guys I know seem to think that they will eventually just end up with the right girl. They act like they shouldn't have to look for her, or work hard at relationships, because the perfect person will eventually just appear "out of the sky," as it were. It won't matter how they treat her, or how they act, because she will love them no matter what when she shows up. The thing is, what girl wants to date someone with that attitude? Maybe it's a product of our society (or Hollywood), which seems to promote the image that "one day, it will just happen. You'll magically fall in love, and live happily ever after - no effort required." Honestly, I sometimes think that love is a lot of trouble, it's not a fairytale like that at all!

Anyway, these are just my opinions.