Homework #7

Homework questions

1.Have you ever eaten in a restaurant in a foreign country? Where? What did you eat? Did you make any mistakes? Please explain your experience.
2. Did you learn anything?


Answers
1. Since I am in Japan right now, I have to say "of course I have eaten in a foreign country's restaurant," haha. I love all kinds of Japanese food, so I tend to eat in restaurants a lot. I really like Hiroshima-style okonomiyaki! And yakiniku!! And nabe!!! I am really interested in some of the ways Japanese food is served for large groups of people. For example, with yakiniku everyone shares the same grill and the same food, and you cook it all together. Nabe is sort of the same, it's a "communal" meal that you make along with everyone else at the table. I think those type of dishes are so fun. Since I've studied Japan a lot, especially the food, I haven't made a lot of mistakes in restaurants. I did have to learn the right way to eat nigiri sushi, though: most Americans don't know you should eat nigiri with your hands, and dip it in the soy sauce fish-side down. I watched a TV program about Japanese food and learned the right way to eat it.

2. Actually, I have a couple of funny stories about learning the *wrong* way to eat something in Japan. My mother also loves food, and she has visited Japan with me a couple of times. But when she doesn't know how to do something, she sometimes just tries to figure it out on her own without asking anyone. She was staying at a host family's house, and they once left her alone at the table with a bowl of edamame. My mother had never seen edamame before, but she wanted to eat one, so she picked up the whole bean pod and put the entire thing in her mouth. The fuzzy outside of the pod was like trying to eat a towel, she said. Then her host family came back and showed her the right way to eat edamame, by popping the beans OUT of the pod. She said she was really embarrassed but it was funny, haha.

Also, I once went to a kind of expensive, nice restaurant in Osaka when I was studying abroad. This restaurant was "Japanese + Italian fusion," which means they served dishes that were kind of Italian-style, and kind of Japanese-style combined. It's a great restaurant that was very popular with all the students at my study-abroad university. I liked one of their dishes (a kind of garlic spaghetti) so much that one time, I picked up the plate and licked it. I wanted to get all of the sauce off the plate because it was delicious. When I looked up, all the Japanese people in the restaurant were staring at me. Honestly, even in America you probably shouldn't lick plates at a nice restaurant. But I couldn't help it, it was too good to let the sauce go to waste!!

Homework assignment #6

Homework questions

We talked and saw many international weddings and compared them with Japan.

1.Since Japanese weddings are expensive, do you think having a massive wedding like Korea or UAE is a good idea? Why?
2. What do you think about eloping? Is it a good idea or romantic? Why?
3. Have you ever thought about having a wedding in a foreign location like Hawaii? Would you do it? Why? Or Why not?
4.What is your ideal wedding?
5.What would you definitely do, wear or go to on that big day? Why is that important?
6. Have you ever been to a foreigner's wedding? What was your impression?

Answers

1. For myself, I think I would get wayyyy~ too stressed out if I tried to have a huge wedding. I panic easily. Also, I hate spending money for something that isn't going to last very long (unless it's food!!) So to me, having a massive big wedding doesn't seem like a good idea. It would cost a lot, and then be over in just one day, so there doesn't seem to be much point. I would rather save the money, have a small wedding, and then go on a long vacation afterwards... or maybe buy something important that will last a long time and be fun for me and my husband, like a nice kotatsu!

2. Mmmm I guess eloping might be romantic. While you're hiding away together, it could be super fun. But if you and your new husband's families don't like it that you ran away together, you'll have a big problem when you try to go home... so, if you're going to run away, you might as well run away forever, not just for the wedding. So maybe eloping is romantic, but it's not really a smart or practical thing to do - most of the time. It kind of depends on the circumstances and what's happening, I guess. If you feel like it's the only way to be with the person you love, then I would say "do it!"

3. I want to get married in Japan, at a shrine! 神社 are beautiful and I am Shinto, after all. But I'm not sure I like the idea of a Japanese wedding reception. It sounds very formal. Four of my friends got married this year, and they all had big parties afterward for the reception - people danced and sang and ate a lot. Those parties were very very fun, so I'd like to have a reception more like American style. I kind of worry it would be hard to get a Shinto wedding here because I'm a foreigner though... my Japanese is sort of okay, but it might be difficult to communicate. And what if there are no shrines that will marry 外国人...？

4. To be honest, I don't know if I'll ever get married. I have a lot of different ideas about getting married, and about what sort of wedding ceremony I'd like if I did. If I had to pick just one way, I guess I would stick with wanting to have a Shinto wedding at Fushimi-Inari Taisha 伏見稲荷大社. (I don't even know if they allow people to get married there, hahaha...) But if I could, I'd do the traditional Japanese ceremony there, and then have a big American-style reception. There would be tons of good food - all my favorite things to eat. Also, I'd want a huge, huge HUGE beautiful cake. In Japan they sometimes have fake cakes that the bride and groom cut together, but mine has to be a REAL cake, and it has to be delicious. Yeah, those are the most important things to me... going to a shrine and then having delicious cake... and then afterwards a fun trip somewhere for the honeymoon. Like Disneyland.

5. If absolutely nothing else works out, I'd definitely eat lots of cake. The cake is the most important part of the wedding to me, because I love food... and wedding cake is special, special cake. You don't get to eat it very often. And of course, on that day I would cry alot. I'm the type of person who cries when they get emotional - even when I'm very happy.

6. Actually, I haven't ever been to a foreign wedding. Those four friends of mine who got married this year all had sort of "normal" American weddings, mostly Christian-themed. Many foreign wedding customs sound interesting, though. I think Americans like to pick and choose different events to include in their weddings, sometimes they pick things from foreign traditions even if they don't belong to that country.

Homework assignment #4 & #5

Homework questions

Class #6 was about the different concepts of time in different cultures.

1. Please explain a time proverb in your culture.

2. What do the following proverbs mean:
a. Time is money.
b. A stitch in time saves nine.
c. There's no time like the present.
d.Let's meet at 4. If I'm not there by 5, leave without me at 6, and I'll be there at 7.

For Class #7, since we spent so much time listening about the food and culture of Denmark, please comment about Ms. Camilla's presentation. Which part surprised you the most? What kind of Danish food do you want to try?

We also talked about many superstitions in many countries. The homework is to answer the following questions.

1.Do you think it is important to talk about superstitions in cross culture communication class? Why?

2.Is communication affected by superstitions?

3.Do you believe in superstitions? If yes, what superstitions do you believe?Why do you do, use, or believe in them?

Homework answers

Time

1. "Time flies." / "Time waits for no man." These sayings both mean about the same thing: no matter what you do, time is going to pass. It won't ever stop, even if you want it to. They also mean that the world never stays the same; there's always something changing. Kids grow up, you lose touch with friends, you get new a job, and so on, and then before you even really notice, years have gone by.

You can also say "Time flies when you're having fun" to point out that time seems to go by even more quickly when you're doing something you enjoy. For example, if you like karaoke, you can sit in a karaoke box and have fun with your friends for hours and hours without even being aware that the entire day has gone by. This happens to me a lot!

2. a. "Time is money." This proverb is often said when you work for a company or a business of some sort. It means that if you're wasting time, you're also wasting money. If you aren't busy working on something, then you aren't going to be able to make any cash.

b. "A stitch in time saves nine." This proverb uses sewing imagery to make a point: if you pop a seam on a piece of clothing, but you don't do anything about it when you first notice, then the hole is going to get bigger. But if you make 1 stitch to close the hole early, then the hole won't need 9 stitches later. In other words, the longer you leave a problem alone, then the worse it's going to get. If you fix it when you first realize there's something the matter, then it won't have a chance to get bigger.

c. "There's no time like the present." Basically, this is like saying "you might as well do [whatever you were just talking about] right now." For example, if you're talking to a friend about having to study for a test - You: 'I wonder when I should get out my book and start reviewing...?' Friend: 'There's no time like the present. If you start reviewing earlier it's better, and there's no reason to wait.'

d. "Let's meet at 4..." I'd actually never heard this phrase referred to as a 'proverb' but... It pretty much means, "if I'm late, then don't wait for me too long. I'll catch up with you later." You might say it when you aren't sure if you'll be able to meet someone punctually. You want them to wait for you a little bit, but then not worry if you aren't there and go on ahead - that way they aren't stuck hanging around, and you can meet them when you have time.

Denmark

I was really surprised to learn that Danish people keep their lights so dim when they're inside. Also, I didn't know that they try not to go outside at all in winter, but instead go crazy and stay outside all the time in summer. It almost seems like they hibernate, haha. The cuisine they like was very interesting too. I think all the food sounds great, especially the milk and cheese - I want to try eating decorations from a Danish Christmas tree, too.

Superstitions

1. I think it's interesting to talk about the superstitions of other cultures, because it can show what the culture finds very important. For example, many Japanese superstitions say that if you don't do the correct thing, something bad will happen to your parents, or you won't be able to help your parents when they need it. This shows that Japanese culture places a special importance on family: you want to follow the superstitions, just to be sure your parents don't suffer. American superstitions are more focused on knowing things ahead of time. Think about the cat licking his tail or washing his face, which tells us we can expect rain or visitors. Americans usually like to be prepared ahead of time for whatever happens, and they hate it when they don't know what's going on, so those superstitions are related to that cultural need.

2. Communication could easily be affected by superstitions, at least if you're in a place where people take superstition very seriously. If you did a lot of things that the people around you were superstitious about, it would probably make them nervous and hard to talk to them.

3. I believe in many superstitions - I think it's because I'm a person who wants to be lucky, and I always worry because my luck is normally pretty bad. If I hear about even a small thing to help my luck, I'll probably do it. For example, I haven't bought an おみくじ since August, because the last omikuji I got gave me 大吉, and I don't want to pick out another omikuji that will cancel that good luck. I only offer 5 yen coins at shrines, because a Religions teacher once told me that the kami like them (especially Inari-sama) so maybe they'll help get my prayers granted. I do things like that to help protect my fortune!

Homework assignment #3

Homework questions

1. Do you judge people according to what they wear? Why?
2. Do you think Japanese society puts an importance on clothing when judging other people from another country?
3. What colors are you wearing now? Do they reflect your mood?

1. What are some subjects that you will never discuss with a friend?
2. Do you have different friends for different parts of your life? If so, how are they different to you? Do you talk about different things? Go to different places? Give me some examples.

Answers

1. I think making snap judgements based on peoples' appearances is almost inevitable - it's human nature to do so. But I usually try to rethink my really quick judgements using some kind of reason and logic, more slowly, when I have the chance. So maybe having nice clothes is important for making first impressions, but I try not to let it completely overshadow my thoughts.

2. Well, from my experience, foreigners in Japan usually get an "escape clause" - if their clothes or other appearances look kind of "weird," maybe they aren't judged so harshly because they're foreign. By definition, they fall outside the normal categories and expectations that the Japanese reserve for themselves and their insular society.

3. Actually the colors I'm wearing now (black and red) are the result of my having not done laundry for the past week. It's all I had left that was clean, haha.

1. Usually politics is off-limits, right from the start. I have a lot of friends who don't agree with my ultra-liberal views, so trying to talk about it really just makes for unnecessary conflict. I won't convince them I'm right, and they won't convince me that they're right, so there's no point in bringing it up unless I want to get into an argument.

2. Since I'm interested in some really odd things (like Shinto, and certain kinds of Japanese media) which not a lot of other people are into, I actually wind up spending a lot of my free time by myself. Usually if I'm doing something "normal" like going out to eat, that's when I hang out with others. So I guess you can say that I keep my friends at a distance in that way. ...Except for my boyfriend, who knows everything about me, and usually does everything with me when we're together - even if he sometimes wishes he didn't have to, hahaha.

Homework assignment #2

Homework questions

1. a. Do you have any international friends or a host family? If so, how would you express your condolences to them if a family member died? If not, then how would you express condolences to an American host family if their Grandmother died?

b. Have you ever been to a foreign funeral?
2. a.Why are Japanese designer label crazy? Why is what you wear so important?

b.What does “Don’t judge a book by its cover” mean to you?

Answers

1. a. When I was studying abroad in Hirakata-shi (halfway between Osaka and Kyoto) I had a Japanese host family. I liked them very, very much, so I'm glad nobody in their family died while I was there. However, if I ever needed to attend a Japanese funeral, I would be sure to wear black, and bring condolence money in a special black & white envelope to the ceremony. Also, I might send flowers. I've heard there's something special you can say in Japanese to express "I'm very sorry for your loss," and tell them you're sad that such a bad thing happened, but I'm not sure what it is. Maybe someone can let me know in a Comment?

b. I've never been to a foreign funeral. Actually, I've only been to one funeral in my whole life: it was for my grandfather, who died a long time ago while I was in junior high. I don't remember much about it except standing next to the grave when we went to the cemetery to bury him.

2. a. Hmmm. I really don't care about fashion at all, because I usually spend my money on other things. But if I were to guess, I'd say it's nice to have a fancy designer label on things for several reasons. When they see a famous name on something you own, other people will recognize it, and think you have good taste, because designer labels have history and prestige attached to them by society. Also, designer goods are often expensive and usually well-made: when you buy them, you're advertising your knowledge about what's good quality, and also showing the fact that you are rich.

b. "Don't judge a book by its cover" means to me that you should actually try to avoid thinking the way I described in answer "a." That is, instead of just jumping to the conclusion that superficial, meaningless assets represent how good something is overall, you should try looking more deeply into matters and making an informed decision. For example, only assuming that a designer label means a better product, or believing that someone's physical beauty makes them a good person, is "judging a book by its cover." Testing an item for sturdiness, or becoming friends with someone, would be ways of "not judging a book by its cover." Basically, don't put all your faith in surface appearances alone!

Homework assignment #1 (revised)

Homework questions
1) We discussed the Japanese concept of "wrapping." Do you agree with the web site's description? What do you do that can be called "wrapping"? Give examples and reasons for your actions.

2) Regarding the discussion of "Death and Funerals": answer these questions in your blog.

a. Where do you go when you die?

b. Explain why do Japanese have death memorial services 1 month, 1 year, 3 years, 7 years, etc. after a person's death?

Answers

1) Analyzing Japan from this "wrapping" standpoint is very popular in many textbooks about Japanese culture. I have heard about the idea before. The way the website described this behavior makes sense to me. So many things in Japan are all about presentation - the way they look and act from the outside, compared with what's really going on inside. In some cases, maybe you're never allowed to see all the way into the true heart of a matter. But the hints provided by the surface allow you to imagine or figure it out by yourself. To me, this tendency often gives Japanese matters a sense of mystery and subtlety. Maybe you have to be alert and sensitive to figure out what's really happening under all those layers.

Partly, I also think "wrapping" is what makes Japan a beautiful place: even something like a small package of drain cleaner or sugar are considered in great detail. A good's appearance and ease of use are taken into account when it's packaged. If you compare the way products are wrapped in Japan versus the way they are wrapped in America, I think you can see America's "do it yourself" approach: in America you almost never get pre-measured amounts of product, you're expected to parcel it out by yourself when you're using it.

Also, think about how an oyster "wraps" a grain of sand until it becomes a pearl. The thing that started out as being boring, and annoying to the oyster, turns into something beautiful - or at least it becomes less annoying. Maybe this is a nice metaphor all the "wrapping" of all types that goes on in Japan.

2) a. I practice Shinto, worshipping the Inari kami, which is kind of odd for an American. Shinto often doesn't want to deal with death, because the kami dislike "impure" things and death is considered impure. But, I came up with an idea on my own about what happens after death, which kind of follows along with some Shinto ideas I've studied. I think people mostly stop being aware after they die (with the exceptions of kami, ghosts, Buddhas, and that kind of thing.) The energy that human, animal, and plant spirits are made of goes into the universe, and gets broken down like a fallen autumn leaf turning into soil. Then bits of the purified energy get distributed into new living things when they are born. It's kind of like recycling, where old stuff is turned into new stuff.

b. I actually don't know why there are these carefully spaced out rituals for the dead in Japan. I tried to look it up, but couldn't find one good answer. I saw a bit of research that says "the mortuary tablet of the dead person is thought to have the personality and worldly passions of the deceased until the last anniversary (the thirty-second or forty-ninth year after death)" - that's from a book called 'The Japanese Mind: Understanding Contemporary Japanese Culture.' So maybe the dead have to be taken care of by their family regularly, until they finally become ancestor spirits? I'm not sure.